Don't Leave
by pdb
Summary: Mulder's letter to Scully. it's a song fic. Mulder writes back Scully
1. Leave

Title: Don't Leave  
  
Author: PixieDustBunny  
  
Disclaimer: hello?? it's called *fan* fiction. XF are obviously not mine. too bad.  
  
Additional Disclaimer: the song lyrics found throughout the story are not mine. they belong to  
  
the wonderfully sexy Rob Thomas and Matchbox Twenty. Rob Thomas wrote the lyrics. The song  
  
is called "Leave" and is on their second album, Mad Season. You people *really* need to hear  
  
this album. For the mood of this story, you need to listen to this song.  
  
Credit: credit also goes to Matchbox Twenty for inspiring me!  
  
Rating: PG-13 just to be safe  
  
Author's notes: the point of view changes a lot. Pay attention to whom the letter is   
  
addressed.  
  
Feedback: yes please!  
  
Spoilers: Seasons Eight and Nine. just to be safe.  
  
Dear Dana Scully,  
  
*****************************************  
  
*It's amazing *  
  
*how you make your face just like a wall*  
  
*****************************************  
  
Sometimes I can't tell what you're thinking. You are so good at detaching yourself from our   
  
work. I know it gets to you, especially when little girls are involved. They remind you of  
  
Emily. But from the outside looking in, no one can tell. Sometimes the walls you build get  
  
so high that I can't even tell, except I know how you think. Scully, you need to open up every  
  
once in a while. It'll get to you if you're not careful.  
  
*****************************************  
  
*how you take your heart and turn it off*  
  
*how I turn my head and lose it all *  
  
*****************************************  
  
Scully, I know you love me. Even if you don't know it yet. But you will. I know you know I  
  
love you. I always have. How can you run away from it? What are you afraid of? I guess I   
  
can hold it back, but only to a point. Every once in I while, I see you let go. Like when we  
  
drive. I'll be driving; we won't be talking. I glance over to see you staring at me. I see  
  
the love in your eyes. But as soon as they disappear. They are back up. The walls. You hide  
  
behind them. You feel exposed.   
  
You don't have anything to be afraid of, Scully. I love you. I won't hurt you.  
  
*************************************  
  
*It's unnerving *  
  
*how just one move puts me by myself*  
  
*************************************  
  
They say that our lives are a journey. We often come crossroads in our lives. What we decide  
  
will change our lives forever. But some of the decisions are not up to us. I didn't mean to  
  
be abducted. I know you understand this, but I want you to know that I didn't want it to turn  
  
out like this. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry.  
  
*****************************************  
  
*there you go just trusting someone else*  
  
*****************************************  
  
You don't know how much I hated John Doggett when I met him. I was hurt. I felt replaced. I  
  
understand know why it happened like it did. But I still feel slightly betrayed. I was   
  
jealous.  
  
***************************************  
  
*now I know I put us both through hell*  
  
***************************************  
  
I look into your eyes, and I can tell you've aged. Not physically, mind you. You are still  
  
beautiful. It's just that your eyes are old. Like you've seen too much. Like you've been   
  
through too much. I know that all of that is my fault. You don't know how sorry I am.  
  
************************************************  
  
*I'm not saying *  
  
*there wasn't nothing wrong *   
  
*I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me*  
  
************************************************  
  
I know I'm not perfect. I know I'm not easy to put up with. I guess I never actually thought   
  
that you would give up on me. I never wanted you to. I wish you hadn't.  
  
********************************************  
  
I'm not saying *  
  
we ever had the right to hold on *  
  
I just didn't wanna let it get away from me*  
  
********************************************  
  
Really, the fact that I had the X Files for this long is amazing. I always expected for it to  
  
end. I just didn't think that by ending I meant being booted off for another agent. But that's  
  
not what mattered. Or matters. It's that another man replaced me in your life. I don't want  
  
to lose you. I can't live without you. But I guess I never really had you.  
  
************************************  
  
*But if that's how it's gonna leave*  
  
*straight out from underneath *  
  
*then we'll see who's sorry now *  
  
************************************  
  
I know all good things must come to an end. I just regret it. I was naive to think that I   
  
could have you. It's just hard because I feel like you were snatched from me. I didn't even  
  
have a chance to fight for you. I would have fought for you, you know. I know you don't love  
  
John, even if you think you do. But you will find out in time. I just can't sit around and  
  
watch him sweep you off your feet.  
  
**************************************  
  
*If that's how it's gonna stand, when*  
  
*you know you've been depending on *  
  
*the one you're leaving now *  
  
*the one you're leaving out *  
  
**************************************  
  
But if that's how you want it, who am I to stand in your way. I could beg, I could plead, I   
  
could yell, I could cry, but what difference does it make? I know you're making a mistake, but  
  
some mistakes have to be made so that people grow. And you will grow from this. Just don't   
  
forget me. Please. Don't forget how much I love you. I would die for you. Don't forget that  
  
you're leaving me behind.  
  
*********************  
  
*It's aggravating *   
  
*how you threw me on*  
  
*and you tore me out*  
  
*********************  
  
I'm so frustrated! I have always tried to be there for you. I really have. I know I've   
  
fucked up. But I comforted you when I could. If I could, I would wrap myself around you and   
  
protect you from the evil world. You know that. You knew that. But still, you couldn't take  
  
it anymore. So you disposed of me. Even when I laid down my heart to you. When I see you with  
  
John and Monica, you stomp on my heart. You are so happy. The age in your eyes disappears. You  
  
broke my heart. I don't know if it can be fixed. But I don't want to sit around and see. I  
  
don't want to sit around and let it break time after time.  
  
****************************************  
  
*how your good intentions turn to doubt*  
  
*the way you needed time to sort it out*  
  
****************************************  
  
We never agreed on any theories on the cases. But somehow, we never let it get between us. You  
  
always shot my ideas down, but never me. It was never about us. Somehow, we kept work out of   
  
our friendship. Our relationship. We respected each other. We were perfect together. After I  
  
returned, though, it changed. You changed. We changed. Things change, life goes on. It's   
  
just that, our disagreements on our theories changed to disagreements on each other. On us.  
  
We never spoke about any of this. We could see it in each other's eyes. When I wanted to   
  
actually initiate the relationship that we have danced around for nine long years, I could  
  
see you hesitate. Why? Was it out of fear? Please don't be afraid of me. Of us.  
  
****************************************  
  
*Tell me is that how it's going to end *  
  
*when you know you've been depending on*  
  
*the one you're leaving now *  
  
*the one you're leaving out *  
  
****************************************  
  
Are we over, Scully? Is this where I leave. I know you need me. You just won't admit it. This  
  
isn't about the X-Files anymore. I don't need the X Files. I need you. I don't mind not   
  
having any involvement in the X Files whatsoever. I don't want to not be involved in your life  
  
though. Don't leave me out.  
  
Forever yours,  
  
Fox Mulder  
  
a/n: you like? review and see Scully's response upon reading the letter and then her letter  
  
to Mulder. will they stay together? i don't know. mwahahahahahahahaha! 


	2. Downfall

Don't Leave Chapter Two  
  
Title: Downfall  
  
Author: PixieDustBunny  
  
Disclaimer: not mine.  
  
Additional Disclaimer: Again, I bow down to Matchbox Twenty and Rob Thomas (oh so sexy) for   
  
their ability to actually get me to focus on the lyrics of their songs. This one is called  
  
"Downfall" and it is from their newest album "More Than You Think You Are."  
  
Spoilers: same as before  
  
A/N: special thanks to my beta!  
  
HERE WE GO!  
  
Dear Mulder,  
  
*******************************  
  
*I wonder how you sleep *  
  
*I wonder what you think of me*  
  
*******************************  
  
Do you even know me, Mulder? You claim to know me, but the way you talk about me is not even  
  
close to how I am. You already have sleeping problems, I know. But how can you even try to  
  
sleep after writing what you wrote? How can you live with yourself? How can you think that I   
  
would replace you, Mulder. You know better.  
  
**********************************  
  
*If I could go back *  
  
*Would you have ever been with me*  
  
**********************************  
  
You are right in one respect, though. I do build walls around myself. Too often. And since  
  
there's no use denying it, I'll just come out and say it. Fox Mulder, I love you. I love you  
  
more than life itself. It really pains me to say that. You have to understand that. It's not  
  
because it's not true. I do love you. I just get scared. Not of you. Just of... I don't   
  
know. Just scared.  
  
**************************  
  
*I want you to be uneased*  
  
*I want you to remember *  
  
**************************  
  
I want you to be uncomfortable about it like I am. I want you to feel my uneasiness. This is  
  
really hard for me. I don't know how you got me to do this, Mulder. But you always did have  
  
your way with me, whether you knew it or not. Think back to your first love. Your first   
  
heartbreak. That is what I'm afraid of. Do you remember being that gawky teenager? I still  
  
feel like that. But only when I'm around you.  
  
*****************************  
  
*I want you to believe in me*  
  
*I want you on my side *  
  
*****************************  
  
I know you love me. I know you trust me. But do you believe in me? Do you truly believe in  
  
me? I need you to. I want us to be a team. Don't doubt me. Don't ever think for one instant  
  
that I would try to replace you. I know now you know that John Doggett was assigned to me. I  
  
didn't like him. At all. Ask him for yourself. But what else could I do? I had so much more  
  
on my plate. I couldn't waste time fighting him. William. Finding you. I know if you had  
  
gotten a new partner when I was abducted that I would be jealous. But still. Couldn't you have  
  
talked to me before jumping to conclusions?  
  
*************  
  
*Come on *  
  
*Lay it down*  
  
*************  
  
I know that you are paranoid by nature. After working with you for nine years, I think some of  
  
the paranoia has rubbed off on me, too. But don't be paranoid about me and my motives. Just  
  
let it go. I know it's not easy, but I believe in you.  
  
***************************  
  
*I've always been with you*  
  
*Here and now *  
  
***************************  
  
I will always be with you. I don't know if you could get rid of me if you wanted to. I only  
  
ask you one thing. Don't break my heart. I don't know if my heart could take it. I don't  
  
know if I could live.  
  
****************************  
  
*Give all that's within you*  
  
*Be my savior *  
  
*And I'll be your downfall *  
  
****************************  
  
Give yourself to me. I want you. Make me believe in us. I believe in you. I just doubt our  
  
abilities to be together. Make me believe. Give me faith. I know you promised not to hurt  
  
me, but I'm not afraid of that as much as I'm afraid of the opposite. I'm afraid I'll hurt you.  
  
Save me.  
  
****************************  
  
*Here we go again *  
  
*Ashamed of being broken in*  
  
****************************  
  
We are continuing on this endless cycle, Mulder. You say you aren't, but I know you are afraid.  
  
Just like me. How do we stop this path? When do we make the plunge? Will we ever?  
  
******************************  
  
*We're getting off track *  
  
*I want to get you back again*  
  
******************************  
  
But I see our cycle slowly evolving. Changing. I don't know if it's a complete circle anymore.  
  
Is this the plunge? I want you so bad, Mulder. You can't even fathom how much I need you. I  
  
want you so much it physically pains me to see you without me and to think that I may lose you.  
  
Will I lose you?  
  
**************************  
  
*I want you to trouble me*  
  
*I wanted you to linger *  
  
**************************  
  
I miss every part about you. How can you think or even imagine that I want to rid myself of   
  
you? I miss your smile. Your eyes. You. I even miss your crazy theories. I miss you trying  
  
so hard to convince me to believe in them. I don't know if I can. I don't know if I can   
  
believe in us. I want to believe.  
  
*****************************  
  
*I want you to agree with me*  
  
*I want so much so bad *  
  
*****************************  
  
I want you to understand my fears. My hopes. I want to understand yours. I want everything.  
  
I feel like we are so close to having everything. But can two people have everything?   
  
Something is gonna break. I don't know what it is. But something has to give.  
  
*************  
  
*Come on *  
  
*Lay it down*  
  
*************  
  
After rereading this letter up to here I know I sound paranoid. Lose your paranoia. Help me to  
  
lose mine. We can't live like this. Please help me. I need you.  
  
***************************  
  
*I've always been with you*   
  
*Here and now *  
  
***************************  
  
Don't be paranoid about me. Admit it, the letter you sent me was dripping with it. Trust me.  
  
You say you trust me. You say you love me. show me. Trust me to love you and trust you like  
  
you do me. I will always stand by you.  
  
****************************  
  
*Give all that's within you*  
  
*Be my savior *  
  
****************************  
  
Will you stand by me? Promise me you will never leave me. Save me from myself. Give yourself  
  
to me, and I will do the same for you. Show me love. Make me believe.  
  
***************************  
  
*And I'll be your downfall*  
  
***************************  
  
Just don't forget that there are risks we must take in life. Sometimes, I trust you more than  
  
I trust myself. What if I do something to mess us up? I could not bear to break what we have.  
  
Don't let me break us apart.  
  
***************************  
  
*Yeah be my savior *  
  
*Only love can save us now*  
  
*Love save me now *   
  
***************************  
  
With these letters we have reached the point of no return. We can't go back now. If we fail,  
  
we fail together. I believe, though, that if love doesn't get us first, it will save us. Do  
  
you believe?  
  
***************************  
  
*Only love can save us now*  
  
*I'll be your downfall *  
  
*Our love can save us now *  
  
*Love save me now *  
  
***************************  
  
This is it. This is the point of no return. I have always felt that we can undo most of our  
  
actions. But not when it comes to the matter of the heart. Now, we risk our friendship,   
  
ourselves, our everything. This is it, Mulder. We put ourselves in the hands of Fate. We   
  
aren't the type to trust something so readily. But I really want this.  
  
***************************  
  
*Lay it down *  
  
*I've always been with you*   
  
*Here and now *  
  
***************************  
  
Mulder, lay down with me. Together, let's become vulnerable. We've never done this. Let's   
  
trust in something higher than ourselves. For once. I have always stood by you, even when  
  
you left me on your escapades. Like when you went to Oregon. Don't leave me. I won't ever  
  
leave you.  
  
****************************  
  
*With all that's within you*  
  
*Be my savior *  
  
*And I'll be your downfall *  
  
****************************  
  
Give all of yourself to me. I believe, now, that we can conquer our fears. Because I know you  
  
have them, too. Save me. And I'll try to save you. But what if I can't? I don't want to hurt  
  
you.   
  
***************************************  
  
*Now I'm back on my own *  
  
*Yeah my feet are heavy, made of stone*  
  
***************************************  
  
When I first read your letter, I knew that the choice was mine. I was on my own. Like I was  
  
after you went to Oregon. I'm tired. I don't want to be alone. I feel like I can't go on by  
  
myself. I need you, Fox Mulder.  
  
****************************************  
  
*I'll make you go where I go *  
  
*Well they're here, can I take you home*  
  
****************************************  
  
I guess, even though our jobs and subsequently are lives have become rather unconventional, I   
  
still yearn for convention. I don't know why. But as cheesy as I sound, I want to walk   
  
through life with you. I want to share in your joy, your pain, your sorrows, your hopes, your  
  
dreams, your trials, you tribulations. I want you to share in mine. We are stronger together.  
  
There's no point in denying it. Come with me. Be with me.  
  
*************************************  
  
*And I'm coming home, on my back *  
  
*Kissing me, your lips painted black*  
  
*************************************  
  
I know you, Mulder. I just don't know what tomorrow brings. I can envision you, though,   
  
carrying me. Physically. Emotionally. Mentally. Spiritually. I want you to kiss me. I want  
  
you to wrap your arms around me and never let me go. I know you can fulfill my wants. My   
  
needs. But will you? Are you afraid that if we actually initiate our relationship, we will  
  
be outcasted? I am. But at the same time, I don't care.  
  
*******************************  
  
*Let me be your downfall *  
  
*Let me be your downfall baby.*  
  
*******************************  
  
Mulder, when people fall in love, like I did with you, they give themselves to the person.   
  
They find it so easy to give in. Give in to me. Let me be the one to break your hard exterior.  
  
Let me in. I want to be let in, and I know you want to give in to me. I want to give in to  
  
you. I love you.   
  
Yours today, tomorrow, and forever,  
  
Dana Scully 


	3. Busted

Title: Busted  
  
Author: PixieDustBunny  
  
Disclaimer: XF are not mine, yadda yadda yadda  
  
Additional Disclaimer: The lyrics are from yet another Matchbox Twenty song. The song is called Busted and  
  
it is on their first album (to make it big, cuz i know they did others before) Yourself or Someone Like You.  
  
Thanks to: JD Burns  
  
Author's notes: it took me forever to find a song that I thought portrayed Mulder's feelings so well. Hope  
  
you enjoy!  
  
My Scully,  
  
**************************************  
  
*I forget when words were only words *  
  
*she knows the party makes me nervous*   
  
**************************************  
  
I didn't to hurt you with my first letter. You're right, though, the paranoia has pretty much taken me   
  
over. But I'm not paranoid about you. Never. I trust you. And I do believe in you. You are the only  
  
thing I believe in. Everyone else makes me nervous. I'm a litte untrusting. Well, maybe more than a   
  
little. But never with you.  
  
*********************************  
  
*In this stage we can't get hurt*   
  
*Don't try to understand me *  
  
*********************************  
  
Scully, I assure you that we won't get hurt. I love you too much to hurt you. And I know you won't hurt  
  
me. Even if you don't know it. I'm not an easy person to handle, I know. I can be too much sometimes.   
  
As you wrote, lay it down. Don't try to figure me out. I can't figure me out.  
  
**********************************  
  
*We're too cool to be alone *  
  
*But, not too crazy to get busted*   
  
**********************************  
  
So, we have taken the plunge. Are you afraid? I am, but only that I will lose you. It's weird. I'm  
  
usually so independent. I never rely on anyone. Or worry about anyone. Except you. You have become my  
  
life. Have I become yours? I don't need to be. I just need to be a part of yours. I'm tired of being  
  
alone. We have handled so much together, Scully. Aliens, liver-eating men, monsters. You name it, we   
  
conquered it. I believe that we can handle something as conventional as love. Right? It's funny, though.  
  
We have never been truly afraid of anything we fought. Except this. It's crazy. We're crazy. But it's  
  
okay. In a way, I like it. There is always a risk, though. But we seem to be able to handle a friendship  
  
for nine years, what can be so different? Can it be so hard that we can't handle it?  
  
***********************************  
  
*I found out one life ain't enough*   
  
*I need another soul to feed on *  
  
*I'm the flame I can't get burnt *  
  
***********************************  
  
Last night, when I was lying sleepless on my couch, I thought about how much you have changed my life.   
  
Really. I never needed anybody. I stayed cooped up in my basement. Then slowly, through the years, I   
  
started referring to it as *our* basement. Even though I never let on. Even when it became our basement  
  
and our X Files and our desk, I still believed that I didn't need anyone. That's why I never put your  
  
name on the door. Or bought you a desk. I'm sorry. But now I see what I have been missing in my life.  
  
You. I need to share life with someone. With you. Yet I still feel invincible. Like no one can hurt me.  
  
I guess because I have nothing to lose. Until now. I can lose you. I am so afraid.  
  
********************************  
  
*I'm wholly understated *  
  
*I found silence in this space *  
  
*An on and off again attraction*  
  
********************************  
  
I think that people underestimate us. Underestimate me. But not you. You always believed in me. You   
  
don't know how much that means to me. Before you walked into my life, I found solstice in my basement. My  
  
life became the X Files. I became Spooky. "Nobody down here but the FBI's Most UNwanted." I still   
  
remember our first meeting. I truly felt what I said. But you intrigued me. My offputting cynicism did  
  
not seem to phase you. That's what first amazed me. How ironic that the walls that protected you from me  
  
haven't come down for good in nine long years.  
  
***************************   
  
*I need such amazing grace*   
  
*Heaven sweep me away *  
  
***************************  
  
You are so wonderful. I love everythig about you. Before you, no one has ever been able to get under my  
  
skin like you. I don't know how my life would be without you. I was like the Lone Gunmen without the   
  
companionship they share. I don't know if I could've survived.  
  
*******************************************  
  
*love don't change, don't come around here*   
  
*don't wear my heart on your sleeve *  
  
*like a high school letter *  
  
*******************************************  
  
In a world that is constantly changing, will you be my constant? my touchstone? Will I be yours? Be my  
  
love, be my life. I give you my life. You hold my heart in your hands. Don't wear my heart on your   
  
sleeve. Don't let it hang out to dry. Will you protect it? Will you protect me? I promise to protect you.  
  
**********************************************  
  
*don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*   
  
**********************************************  
  
I don't want this to hard for you. I don't want to be your burden. Rather, I want to ease your load. Just  
  
sit back, don't worry. We can save each other. I believe in us.  
  
******************************************  
  
*and the people we've become, well *  
  
*they've never been the people who we are*  
  
******************************************  
  
Are you what you wanted to be when you grew up? Of course not, I'm not either. I never expected to find   
  
myself in a dark basement. Fairy tales always talk about Prince Charming. I don't believe in him. But why  
  
isn't there a Princess Charming? I've met her. You rescued me from the dungeon of the FBI. Do you realize  
  
that? You saved me. You ask me to be your savior, but I think it's the other way around.   
  
******************************************  
  
*I strap on one horse and prayed for luck*   
  
*I dug another hole to bleed *  
  
*I know exactly how this works *  
  
*I need a new feel dirty *  
  
******************************************  
  
Okay, we have taken the plunge. When I got your letter, I prayed. I don't pray. But I did. I don't know  
  
what compelled me to, but I did. And I thought over our past nine years, and I cried. I haven't always   
  
been the best friend. I often thought of myself. Over the years, though, I kind of faded away into us. I  
  
used to wallow in my own misery. I developed a pattern of self abuse. And then, without even knowing it,  
  
you saved me. You make me a better person.  
  
***************************************  
  
*I don't need you crowding up my space*  
  
*I just want to get inside you *  
  
***************************************  
  
When you first came, I wasn't happy. As I said, I thought you were sent to spy on me. I thought you would  
  
cramp my style. But on our first case together, when you came into my hotel room, you were so afraid.   
  
When you took off your robe, I didn't know what to think. You seemed so innocent. I think that was the   
  
first time I loved you. And I have never stopped.  
  
************************************  
  
*You can't blame the heart you save*   
  
*Giving something away *  
  
************************************  
  
You saved me. Somehow, you save me everyday, time after time. I know you can't keep pushing me way.   
  
Something has to give. I will. I give in to you. Will you give something away? Will you give me your  
  
heart.  
  
*******************************************  
  
*Love don't change, don't come around here*   
  
*Don't wear my heart on your sleeve *  
  
*Like a high school letter *  
  
*******************************************  
  
Don't change. You are perfect as you are. Just let me in. When I lay down to you, don't kick me. Take me  
  
for what I am. I'm just man in love. Will you accept me? Will you accept my love?  
  
**********************************************  
  
*Don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*  
  
**********************************************  
  
If you have to work to love me, don't. It won't work. Relationships take work, but love comes naturally.  
  
I loved you long before I even knew it.  
  
*******************************************   
  
*And the people we've become, well *  
  
*They've never been the people who we are *  
  
*Love don't change, don't come around here*   
  
*******************************************  
  
We will change, we will grow, regardless of our attempts to stop. The people who we are today are not the  
  
people we were nine years ago. But, through all we have been through, my love for you hasn't changed.   
  
Please, don't let your love for me change.   
  
**********************************************  
  
*Don't wear my heart on your sleeve *  
  
*Like a high school letter *  
  
*Don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*  
  
**********************************************  
  
You are afraid you will hurt me. You won't unless you mean to. Don't hurt me. But don't stain not to  
  
hurt me. If you feel like you want to hurt me, leave. You leaving will hurt enough. I promise to do the  
  
same for you.  
  
******************************************  
  
*And the people we've become, well *  
  
*They've never been the people who we are*  
  
******************************************  
  
Do you like the man I have become? I love you. Whenever I see you, I feel like I could go everywhere at   
  
once. I love you and I need you. You need me. You wonder whether I can fulfill your needs. Of course I  
  
can, I don't doubt myself of that ability.   
  
*********************************************  
  
*I dreamed that the world was crumbling down*   
  
*We sat on my back porch and watched it *  
  
*I dreamed that the buildings all fell down *  
  
*We sat on my back porch and watched it *  
  
*********************************************  
  
I had a dream that the world fell down around us. We weren't hurt. Don't you see, Scully? Together, we   
  
are invincible. People can damage us, but they can't make us fall. Only we hold that power. In my dream,  
  
we held each other and watched patiently as the world destroyed itself.  
  
********************************  
  
*In my head I heard the sound *  
  
*Like fifteen strangers dancing*   
  
********************************  
  
Then, in my dream, I heard yelling. I heard dispair, pain and loss. But above all of it I heard you. You  
  
are my everything.  
  
*****************************************  
  
*But oh how I want you to know me *  
  
*Oh how I want you to know me *  
  
*Oh how I wish I was somebody else, baby*  
  
*****************************************  
  
I apologize for my first letter. I admit, the paranoia did set in. I don't know why. I didn't even   
  
realize it. But you are wrong. I do know you. Do you know me? I don't doubt you do. You know me better  
  
than I know myself. I wish I could be better for you, Scully.   
  
********************************   
  
*Oh how I wish you could own me*  
  
********************************  
  
I hope you will make me yours.  
  
*******************************************   
  
*Love don't change, don't come around here*  
  
*Don't wear my heart on your sleeve *  
  
*Like a high school letter *  
  
*******************************************  
  
I have made you mine. Don't for one instant think otherwise. By loving you, I give of myself. Do whatever  
  
you want with me. I promise not to break your heart because by doing so, I would be breaking my own.  
  
**********************************************  
  
*Don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*   
  
*And the people we've become, well *  
  
*They've never been the people who we are *  
  
**********************************************  
  
Don't worry. I won't hurt you. Believe in yourself. You won't hurt me. As long as you love me, you can't  
  
be my downfall. Underneath everything that you have become, I see the real Scully. Do you see the real me?  
  
I am afraid I lost him.  
  
**********************************************  
  
*Don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*   
  
*And the people we've become, well *  
  
*They've never been the people who we are *  
  
*Don't strain, cuz nothing ever comes from it*  
  
*And the people we've become, well *  
  
*They've never been the people who we are *  
  
**********************************************  
  
Help me find him. I think he is in you. I think he gave himself to you before I even knew you. It's funny  
  
how somehow, we do not believe we are what we seem to be, until someone else walks into our lives. You  
  
came, you saw through my mask, you saw into my heart. Now, you hold it in your hands. Forever.  
  
Always yours,  
  
Fox Mulder 


End file.
